7.17.2007

oy.













[Above: from Sash and Dee's wedding: September 2004. At Left: Mike at Penn circa 1987. From Roberta. At Right... the Goldthwaites, Rocks, and Youngs in NH 2004. Just 3 years ago. I was preggers with Baxter.]

So...FedEx is on its way with passport on board the truck to... my house in...New Jersey.


And I'm currently in New Hampshire

As Liz used to say, "f*ck a duck! "


But, thanks to Susan Murphy, who spent time on the phone with FedEx… I think I might STILL be able to go to freaking france. She arranged for the package to be left at my house with no signature. She's going to pick it up now and have it overnighted UPS to my parents house in Hebron, NH. Still leaving me about 24 hours to spare.

*******

In the meantime, I woke up this morning in the middle of the most amazing dream about mike. I've only had like 2 vivid dreams of healthy mike since his death. This was the best.
I was leaving a baseball game or a show or something ... and I was standing outside some room that looked like a coat check. I think it was the coat check at the Mask and Wig club, where Heather and Matt got married. I peeked in the room and behind a couple of people there was Mike.

Content, arms folded in front of him. Navy windbreaker draped over his arm, wearing his olive green button down shirt - sleeves rolled up. Watch on his wrist. With his lil' brown structure vest on. Khakis and wingtip shoes. He even had on his leather fanny pack - ahem... man-purse. It was Mike circa 2001, for sure.

He gave me a little smile and did a little Mike wave and tucked his hair behind his ear. It reminded me of how he would greet Jen Childs after an 1812 show out in the lobby of the Adrienne.

We hugged and smooshed sooo hard. I could feel him in my arms. I just squeezed and squeezed. He didn't know he'd been gone. I barely spoke to him. But he looked right in my eyes. Then, we stopped hugging and Kevin came in. They joked and "shanked" each other in the gut - a fake stabbing gesture that they did to each other for years. Kevin put mike in a headlock and Mike pretended to punch him in the gut - at which point Kevin faked an enormous injury. Mike was laughing so hard. His eyes sparkled and his head was thrown back.

Then I woke up. I spent the next half hour trying to go back there again.

I love you so much, Mike.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here we all are, a year later. What to say...there are still no words to capture what remains unbelievable.

It still sucks. It sucks hard.

If anyone would like to join us, some friends are meeting at O'Shea's Wednesday evening, just to hang out for a while.

Peace, everyone.
Jessie

Susan said...

the fanny pack!!! OHMYGOD. true love means letting him wear the fanny pack.

LOVE the towel pix. Captures his sparkle perfectly.

Miss miss miss him.

XO,
CSM

Anonymous said...

oy indeed.

That's it, just wanted to also say oy.

Missing the man.

Love,
McManus

Anonymous said...

I have moments where I just stop and realize he's gone. It always makes me miss him, but it also lets me remember him which is a good thing.

-Don

Anonymous said...

Mike lives on forever in the hearts and minds of his family and friends.

We all have to die, but the special ones live on in this way.

Diane C said...

Ditto Don's sentiments. I actually didn't have much contact with Mike or Danna after they moved out of Philly. Ten plus years of being a founding member of the CSZ ladies auxiliary left me with little motivation to attend the Saturday shows.

During Mike's hospitalization, I think I saw him more than I had in the previous 4 years. In the months after Mike's death, I found myself thinking about him much more frequently than when he was around and that still continues to this day. Life is ironic like that.

I will never see a cherry pie without thinking of the man and I will always think back on the Poconos weekend he planned as one of the most enjoyable, relaxing and perfect times of my life. Thank you, Mike Young!

Anonymous said...

Thinking of all of you today and listening to Mike's voice right now. Singing..funny..oh so cute.

Marianne

Anonymous said...

Miss him so much. Thank you for the pictures.
--michaela